What I Learned from Stephen R. Covey: My Review on “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”
Who does want to be effective? I think everybody does want to be it!
But, what does it mean to be effective, exactly, and how do we get there? The responding-explanation of those two questions are what have been researched and tested by Covey several decades ago which now the insights can be easily digested by reading his phenomenal-influential book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.
It’s been 33 years since the book was firstly published, but the global demand towards the book is continually flowing. It’s no surprise that today’s more complex world needs more remedy to keep the balance good, but watching how this book keeps its relevance up until today is amazing.
So, there’s no reason for me to not reviewing this book. I need about one and a half month to finish reading the book, but reading it for twice before I made this review was never a waste of time. So, this is it!
The first to highlight here is Covey stated by himself that the idea of the “7 Habits” was never his. Yet, he humbly conveyed that he just got the opportunity to identified and organized these universal principles of natural laws of being effective people into a sequential framework. According to him, his long career in people, business, and organizational management fields (plus his own persistence, of course) has given him a privilege to research and test the concept of “7 Habits”.
Covey defined “effective” as a quality to get maximum long term benefit. Thus, in short, the term “effective people” are referring to those who could obtain the maximum long term benefit from the resources they used/invested. The case here is: why some people can be effective and some others don’t when given/owned similar amount/type of resources?
The answer is on their “habits”!
Covey believed that when talking about “habit”, we should see it more on “character ethics” dimension, rather than “personality ethics”. Why? It’s heavily because “habit” should be something integrated with our character — it’s inside-out — (which embedded in us, all the time), not only something superficially expressed when we’re with other people or in a certain condition.
Get it?
Well, just take it slow to think about it because, in fact, Covey also suggested us to do so in understanding his book😄 (and yes, I need to read this conceptual part several times to understand Covey’s message😂).
But, in short, let me emphasize that Covey tried to remind us (or, give us a signal) that there’ll be no quick fix when we’re talking or building a habit. It needs time, energy, emotion, and repetition that summoned as “persistence” (Angela Duckworth further called it as “Grit”). When we talk about reforming a habit, it’ll also largely include our willingness to change some parts of our character because it’s highly related to one and another.
Not sure about it? Let’s understand it deeper by talking about the next essential step “So, how do we build our habit to be effective people?”
First thing first, you need three things in advance and it should be sustainable in you: knowledge, skill, and desire. You can’t build a habit without knowing what to do and why you do it (the knowledge). After that, you need to know how to do it so you can start building it (the skills). And, to remain consistent in building it because it’s no quick fix, you need to retain your want of building a habit (the desire).
And, this review or the book it-self could only help you to have access in two things: to know better about the knowledge and skill. But, your desire is something that you need to deal with your own-self in order to transform the knowledge and skills you have about habit to be a true one someday. It’s sad, but it’s true (melancholic back-sound allowed).
Covey believed that the 7 habits are related to one and another. “In harmony with the natural laws of growth, they provide an incremental, sequential, highly integrated approach to the development of personal and interpersonal effectiveness” he wrote.
So, if you question “Can I be effective person while I am implementing just one or two habits?”. Well, my reply to you would be “Cool! Let me see how you do it. And, I would appreciate if you’re successful in doing it”😅. Why? It’s because like a sequence, you’ll find that to build the “next habit”, you need to obtain the quality of the previous habit.
However, Covey also urged that you don’t need to wait until you’re perfect in a certain habit then you may go on to the next, but having the understanding that the 7 Habits are sequential in nature would facilitate you to know “the how” of building it. Once again, up until here, I hope you know that there’s no quick fix in this game, haha (peace).
And, this is it, the brief explanation of the 7 Habits written in sequence:
- Private Factories (the habits here have a lot to do with your personal dimension)
- Be Proactive
As human beings, we are responsible for our own lives. Our behavior is a function of our decisions, not our conditions. We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.
Highly effective people do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.
Covey illustrated that being proactive has a lot to do with managing and expanding our “circle of influence” towards our “circle of concern”. There’re many issues around us, and how we react to it is a product of our circle of influence.
For example, you are working on a project, but you don’t understand one of two concepts in your project. That’s your circle of concern. And, the decision to react to it: whether you’re asking it to your teacher or just keep silent about, becomes your circle of influence. Once you choose to proactively asking to your teacher, your circle of influence will expand to cover your circle of concern as you find a relieve to your issue. Even, in the more advance step, your circle of influence can be bigger than your circle of concern because you’re prepared and well-experienced.
2. Begin with The End in Mind
We’re talking about vision here. A leadership quality.
Most effective people are they who’re visionary or know where to go/what to accomplish. And, this habit resonates well to Covey because he believed that “life is a mission, not a career”.
He believed that “all things are created twice”. It started in your head — your imagination — then when you’re really working on it, it comes true!
Becoming just “go with the flow” is of course not a choice for effective people in this context. As we’ve recognized earlier that “effective” means to get maximum long term benefit, having specific mission/goal is necessary so you can know better how then you would allocate your resources to achieve it.
Even, once you know that your current “resources” aren’t enough to make you achieve your mission, you know then that there’s a room for you to improve your resources, be it by studying specific skills, expanding your network, etc.
3. Put First Things First
By recognizing your goals, you know what your first things are. Now, let’s manage those first things so it can be turned into meaningful-effective actions.
Covey defined “management” as the breaking down, the analysis, the sequencing, the specific application, the time-bound left-brain aspect of effective self-government. So, while leadership decides what “first things” are, it is management that puts them first, day-by-day, moment-by-moment. Just by doing so, you can recognize your priority and maximize your resources for it because it would bring you to get the maximum benefit.
In his book, Covey highlighted the four-quadrant matrix that could help us to know what actions need more prioritization and what need less. He emphasized that Quadrant II is the most important quadrant to focus on, it’s the heart of effective personal management to Covey, yet many people don’t really take optimum action to manage it.
. Public Victories (To achieve long term benefit, most of time you can’t achieve it by working with your own-self, but you also need to work with others)
4. Think Win-Win
Why “collaboration” is hard for some people? It could be because we just want to win — winning our-self — .
Habit number 4 is indeed a foundational paradigm we need before we can go building collaboration with others. It’s about believing that “there’s plenty for everybody” meaning that one’s success isn’t achieved at the expense or exclusion of the success of others.
There’re many stories when collaborations were postponed, cancelled, or ended just because the parties can’t make a “win-win” solution. And, yes it’s understandable because think “win-win” so we can make a “win-win” solution is hard! However, we should understand too that, at the end of the day, we need it because we need others to be effective in accomplishing our mission most of time.
5. Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood
We always want to be listened, so do other people! When you work together with others, it’s highly possible some issues emerge as part of your “circle of concern”, such as disagreement, job problem, and other people behavior. Some people are just going reactive when facing with these issues and do quick fix to it so the work can continue. But, most of time, the remedy isn’t effective because it’s just healing superficial part of the issue.
However, you can always choose to seek first to understand what really happens in your relations with others. You do what Covey called as “empathic listening”. That’s something within your control. And, as you do that, you really, deeply, understand other people. You have accurate information to work with, you get to the heart of the matters quickly, you build “Emotional Bank Accounts”, and you give people the psychological air they need so you can work together effectively.
After all, by doing “empathic listening”, you becomes “influenceable”. And, being influenceable is the key to influencing others. That’s how your “circle of influence” begins to expand.
6. Synergize
The whole is greater than the sum of the parts. When you communicate synergistically, you’re simply opening your mind, heart, and expression to new possibilities, new alternatives, and new options. You might be asking “will it disturb the Habit 2?” No, in fact, you’re fulfilling it, you have the opportunity to make it better. From just getting two, now, you could gain more because you really work together, not just work with others.
. Renewal (as success is combination of two: sustainability and growth, continue upgrading our production capability is as important as keep doing the good habits all the time)
7. Sharpen the Saw
Another important concept from Covey is the “P/PC Balance”. “P” stands for “Production”, while “PC” stands for “Production Capability”. The relational function of the two is: if you want to increase one part, you need to increase the other part too!
Let say you want to get bigger income (in other word, you want to increase your production). Then, you need to invest more in your PC too. Maybe you can pursue higher education degree so you can improve your capacity with the hope to be promoted and get bigger income or you can do other things, you name it!
Sharpen the saw means that we shouldn’t stuck in our comfort zone. As our world is always changing and it brings more complex “circle of concern” to us, we need to continually upgrade our PC so we can always be adaptive with our surroundings, not left behind and ineffective.
Now, we come to the end of the review. To me personally, it’s a true privilege to understand about the universal principles of becoming effective people through Covey’s writing. It might be true that he doesn’t invent the concept, but his help in organizing it into something understandable is heroic.
And, yes, life is on everyone’s ownership. But, most of time, the principles to get success in life is just so implicit. Big thanks to Covey who had persistently researched and tested this topic so other people, like me, can have a potential to build a more meaningful life by becoming an effective person.
Even though this book is quite thick (it’s more than 400 pages long), you’ll find almost every page is valuable to be read mindfully, rather than just skimming it. I can feel how Covey really dedicated himself in arranging the book since every sentences in his book is very authentic. I can feel his emotion, his journey, and his commitment in influencing others so their potential can be potentially tapped.
For you who wants to start building a productive life, this book is for you!